**About 7 months after Sarah died, we had her headstone placed at the cemetery. This is what I wrote for the ceremony.**

Hi everyone. First of all, I want to thank all of you for being here today – I know everyone’s had a busy week and it means the world that you took time out of your Sunday to be here.  Judging by how many of you are here, I’m guessing I’m not the only one who feels like it was just yesterday that we lost Sarah. It hasn’t gotten any easier, for me at least, but I’m hoping that today will bring us all a little more closure and a little more peace.

When we were looking at different options for Sarah’s headstone, I decided I knew one thing – that her stone should tell a little bit of her story. Every detail means something; every detail is a little piece of her heart. Stargazer lilies were one of her favorite flowers; it’s in color because we all know Sarah didn’t do anything in black and white. I probably don’t need to explain why we chose the quote – I’m sure we’ve all heard her singing in our heads at least once since April 1^st. She was also a voracious reader; we chose the open book because her story isn’t finished yet.

What some of you might not be familiar with is the word inside the book. “Saudade” is a Portuguese word that has no direct translation in English. It encompasses the feelings of missing someone you once loved –  both the sadness you feel that they’re gone and the happiness you can find in their memory which makes you feel alive again. Loosely translated, it means “the love that remains.” I think the fact that so many of you are here almost 9 months later shows just how much love remains for Sarah in all of our hearts.

Most of you know that I’ve been desperate to hear from my sister. You also know that Sarah didn’t believe in any of that – she wasn’t religious at all and I couldn’t drag her ass to a psychic if I tried. I was starting to come to terms with the fact that I might never hear from her in that way. Until this past week.

After Sarah died, Jen, a good friend of mine, and her 5 year old daughter Sophie made some pins with ladybugs on them to attach a handkerchief with Sarah’s initials on it to my wedding dress. When Sophie asked why they were making them, Jen told her that my sister had died in an accident and I wanted something to help me carry her with me on my wedding day. Her daughter hasn’t mentioned anything about it since then.

Until Monday. Jen was dropping Sophie off at school, and there’s a cemetery across the street. It’s obviously there every day but Sophie had never mentioned it. They pulled up and Sophie blurted out “mommy that’s the graveyard.” Jen, a little taken aback, said “yes, it is.” Soph looked over and said “remember Munchie’s sister was in the accident?” Jen said yes, and Sophie, very matter-of-factly, said “well she’s okay now. Tell Munchie she’s okay,” and hopped out of the car and walked in to school.

Jen debated telling me but ultimately decided to, because, as she said “you just never know.”

And then yesterday Sophie asked her out of the blue if she’d told me yet, because she really needed to tell me that my sister was “all better now.”

Part of me thinks maybe I’m just seeing things that aren’t there because I want to hear from her so badly.

But then I thought about it. How else would Sarah choose to send a message to me than on the lips of a little blonde precocious five year old girl who loves magic and playing dress up and Harry Potter and has a heart that’s far older and wiser than her years? And when else would she choose to do it than a few days before she knew I’d be standing in front of all of you, letting you all know that she’s okay.

To quote one of our favorite books, “The Little Prince:”

“All men have stars, but they are not the same things for different people. For some, who are travelers, the stars are guides. For others they are no more than little lights in the sky. For others, who are scholars, they are problems… But all these stars are silent. You – You alone will have stars as no one else has them… In one of the stars I shall be living. In one of them I shall be laughing. And so it will be as if all the stars will be laughing when you look at the sky at night. You, only you, will have stars that can laugh! And when your sorrow is comforted (time soothes all sorrows) you will be content that you have known me… You will always be my friend. You will want to laugh with me. It will be as if, in place of the stars, I had given you a great number of little bells that knew how to laugh.”

I hope you can all leave here feeling a little bit of comfort, and now that you know where she is you can visit her whenever you want.

Thank you for loving her the way you did. All of you. She loved you just as much.